29 January 2008

The Baby Update, or: Two Weeks on Four Hours a Night

Little Elijah has made himself right at home in our living room. The Pack'n'Play that we didn't think we would need and that we got second hand through my mother has seen constant use.

His cradle, lovingly crafted by Eli's Grampa Jasperse out of beautiful cherry wood, has seen less-than-desired usage, probably by the simple fact that Eli seems to favor sleeping all day, not leaving Mommy the option of leaving the living room-kitchen-dining room area of the house for any substantial length of time to sleep in her own bed, therefore negating the use of the cradle, which is in our bedroom. And yes, that was a confusing and record-long sentence.

He does use both, however, and we are grateful for both the family heirloom and the "working" toy garage sale hand-me-down.

The tide is beginning to turn to the cradle's favor though, as Eli is getting less and less nocturnal. Not that Shan and I are hanging "Mission Accomplished" banners on our vehicles, but the other night he did actually sleep through the night, with just an hour and a half of fussiness. Poor, exhausted Mommy slept right through it, leaving Daddy with a crying baby and a snoring wife. Daddy has been abundantly blessed with the Virtue of Patience. And a finished basement with a computer and internet access. However, Mommy did wake up in a panic that morning, sure that little Eli would be shriveled up because we did not keep him on his three hour schedule!

Elijah visited the his doctor today for the two week weigh-in and checkup, and it seems that Mommy and Daddy have a healthy growing typical baby boy on their hands. As a matter of fact, the goal for newborn babies growth is an ounce per day. At his first checkup, Elijah weighed in four ounces past his birth weight, at 7lbs, 8oz. At this check up, he weighed 8lbs, 4oz. So, from birth, he has gained exactly one pound in two weeks.

A bit of quick math, 16 ounces over 14 days, means that our son is the over achiever we always knew him to be. Take that, all you average babies! Our baby is bringing your numbers up! Get used to it, lots of teachers grade on a curve. Did I mention he nearly aced his APGAR test? I am certain he'll be crawling within the month, and walking by spring. He also continues to exceed his daily quota of wet and dirty diapers by at least two. By kindergarten, he'll be fluent in English, Hebrew, and ancient Greek, and have a working knowledge of Biblical archaeology.

Today Daddy was also formally baptized into fatherhood, the culmination of nearly a year's worth of study and practice. Today, Daddy had to change clothes along with Elijah after a burp session. Mommy laughed, having been baptized on the first day, and numerous times since then. She even had the audacity to comment on the size of my baptizm, saying it "wasn't bad" and, "he did that to me twice yesterday while you were at work". Sticks and Stones, though. My son and I shared a bonding moment when he baptized me, and nothing anyone can say will take that away from me.

His eyes are continuing to darken, turning from that weird newborn greyish blue to brown, and he is focusing more now. We can tell that Mommy's voice is recognized. We knew it was before, but now we can tell it on his face. If he's a bit fussy, and Mommy says his name, we can watch him calm down! Unfortunately, this is not a superpower that Daddy posesses.

Daddy does posess the diaper changing power. The reason this is a superpower is the fact that Daddy cannot handle the smell of puke, the smell of poopie, and spiders. Daddy has not had to run from the nursery with his hand in front of his mouth holding back barf, and just this simple fact is enough to claim diaper changing as a superpower. That and Daddy didn't flinch during his son's circumcision, so Daddy must also have the superpower of Stay Strong.

Eli, too, must have superpowers. I dare anyone to challenge his kung-fu grip. He is very alert and aware of his surroundings as well, having the other day discovered his cheek and face, and pain all at the same time. We think he tried to pull his eyeball out, but we're not sure. He gave Mommy a mean roundhouse kick to the kidneys the other day, I think because the "restaurant" didn't open soon enough.

He also is practicing to become a male model. He gave us his first "look" this weekend, pouting his lips just like his hero Derek Zoolander. I tried giving him a faux-hawk yesterday, and it looked sweet. It was short, so really I just combed all the hair to the top of his head, but it was cool nonetheless.

If I could sum up this entire post in one sentence, it would be this: My son Elijah is the cutest, smartest, strongest, healthiest baby around.


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